Yeah, 2018 was a shitty year for me … I was fired from a very good place, where I was earning a great salary. I couldn’t get another job because I don’t have a degree that allows me to teach (I’m an English teacher) because for various reasons I couldn’t finish university, so other schools won’t hire me. I didn’t earn enough money to go back to study, I was barely making a living paying bills and buying groceries for my house. I couldn’t pay my kids tuition, I was in serious debt … some nights we didn’t have anything to eat, for me it’s ok, but I didn’t want my kids to be without food. It was seriously depressing, and I was actually depressed for all of these reasons.
So it was a very difficult year, and I don’t expect this new one to be better. I still don’t have my degree so there’s no chance to get another job, no chance in getting a good salary, and all of these together means no improvement in my daily life.
Did I say how much I hate December? Well, I do. I hate this month, for me it’s a Lonely and disappointing month … Christmas and New Year holidays are boring, we have to dress up and fake smiles and greet with kisses and hugs even to people we don’t care about. And the worst date is the 26th, which happens to be my birthday. It’s lonely. I’m always disappointed, sad, wishing to be somewhere else, far, far away. I don’t have money to celebrate, so my wonderful mom always uses Christmas’ scraps and buys me a cake and celebrates with me and the rest of my family, and I’m always faking happiness and pretend to have a good time …
Bottom line, this post is very pessimistic 😂😂! But at least I’m venting … I can’t complain for this year new year’s celebration, though. I totally went against my mom and decided to stay in my house, with my kids. We were in house clothes, barefoot, doing whatever we wanted, eating chips and drinking iced coke (in my country is summer), later we sat on the sidewalk and started to fire some rockets in the middle of the streets because there were no cars at that time, and it was so much fun!
Nevertheless, I have to confess … I’m still hoping for a better year, I still hope to get another job, to earn more money so we can live a better life, please don’t be mistaken, I’m not a materialistic person, I don’t care about clothes or shoes or things, I just want to provide my family with tasty food and safety very day, so I will pray or wish for that.
Happy New Year!